Butterfly
by Dark-Wolf91
Summary: Keira's life in Haven City starting from the time she arrived to the time she was reunited Jak, leading up to the end of Jak 3.


_Disclaimer: The characters from Jak and Daxter: The Precursor Legacy, Jak 2, and Jak 3, do not belong to Dark-Wolf91_

_Summary: This fic is about Keira, how she felt when she first landed in a strange place, her life before she found Jak and Daxter, her life after she found the heroes, her life after Jak was banished into the Wasteland, and her life when Jak broke her heart at the end of Jak 3. Basically, this is about Keira's well . . . life in Haven City, and uh . . . Spargus._

_Pairings: Keira/Jak, Keira/Erol, and I don't know if it'll end up as Keira/Torn yet. You decide. Hehehe._

_Rating: R Contains blood, gore, rape and hints of suicide._

_Butterfly_

_1(Prologue) _

_Unbearable_

I stood by the entrance to Spargus, watching as Jak take Ashelin's waist, pulling her for that kiss . . . that kiss that belonged to me . . . I felt tears running down my face as I stood there just . . . watching. It was unbearable . . . painful . . . He belonged to _me_! Stop it . . . please . . . Stop it . . .

Get away from him . . .

He belongs to me . . .

Get your hands off of him!

I ran. I ran away from that disgusting sight. Jak didn't see me. Neither of them saw me. No one saw me . . . the crying figure that just stood there . . . watching as the man she loved be taken by someone else.

Tears were now streaming uncontrollably down my face. This is the worst! I zipped past the lone wastelanders who were walking aimlessly into the cold, dark night. I was running for the cliff where I could be alone. I needed to think. I needed to be . . .

Alone?

I was already alone. I always have been. My life had gone horribly wrong since I arrived in this god-forsaken time. How could god be so selfish? Why do I have to be cursed with nothing but _pain_? I have sacrificed _everything_. My life, my dignity, my purity, my virginity . . . I had lost my love and then found him . . . only to be taken from me once again. What more did the precursors need? If they hated me so much why couldn't they just kill me? Nothing. I have nothing. I gave everything I had . . . and I got nothing in return . . .

It's over . . . all my . . . sacrifices . . . all I lost . . . was for nothing . . . I gave up everything, I dedicated myself to Jak . . . I thought he loved me? But then . . . I thought Erol loved me too . . .

I've been used . . . they're all the same! I hate them all! But really . . . what I hate the most, it's me. I hate myself for letting them believing their so-called "I love you" speech . . . I hate myself for letting them trample over my heart . . . I hate myself because I allowed them to use me . . .

I've been hurt a lot of times . . . but they don't know that don't they? No one knows the hell I've suffered . . . the unbearable pain . . . the lies . . . the abuse . . . everything . . . Don't I deserve a little happiness? I'm tired . . . so very tired . . . I should be used to this pain by now . . . how could I trust a man again? I can't trust anyone. They're all liars. Every one of them, be it Jak, or Erol, or those drunk men who tried to hurt me . . . those Krimzon Guards who abused me in the streets, who took advantage of me . . . Krew and all those horrible men . . .

But seriously, I thought I was strong. I thought I could handle everything by now?Ihurt so much, it got to the point where I couldn't feel . . . but right now . . . I feel. I feel the pain. It's like someone is stabbing me again and again and they won't stop . . .

Will the pain ever subside? Will it ever stop? I want to be saved. I want to tell someone the things I've been holding back. Hiding. I want to release everything . . . but . . . I can't tell anyone. Because . . . if they knew the truth about me . . .

They're all gonna leave me.

Then . . . I'd really have no one else.

I closed my eyes and watched as the sun set before my eyes. It was gorgeous. I've always loved sunsets but somehow, seeing the sunset now made me feel lonely. Perhaps it was because sunsets reminded me of home.

Home . . .

I gave up my home to be with Jak. I had the chance to go back, to finally forget about those horrible things that happened to me but I didn't. He wanted me to stay. He said he wanted me to be with him! So I stayed . . . But then he left me for her . . .

I thought he loved me. I thought he loved me so much he couldn't bear not to be with me. Apparently my love for him wasn't enough and apparently he didn't love me _that _much.

I laughed. I know now that what Jak had for me was nothing but a huge crush. He was just attracted to me. He didn't love me. And it stung. It hurts so much to know that he didn't love me as much as I loved him.

I sat by one of the rocks and stared out into the distance. I stayed there until the sun had completely disappeared below the horizon. Until the stars had appeared in the sky. I didn't even feel the cold breeze. I just sat there watching the waves . . . the cool serene water . . . the octopus occasionally surfacing to the water . . . recalling all those happy thoughts of Sandover.

Along with those happy memories, I remembered the horrible ones. I desperately shook my head, trying to get rid of those unwanted memories. That was what happened when I felt so alone. Those terrifying things came back to haunt me. I heaved a deep breath and closed my eyes.

I didn't notice the lone figure that sat beside me. Until he spoke that is. "What are you doing here at this time of the night?" His deep voice startled me. I glanced at him and sighed.

"Thinking." I told him. My gaze left him and went back to the shining moon that depicted loneliness.

He fell silent. We sat there in each other's company for a while, drowned in our own thoughts. Out of the corner of my eye I saw his face which was full of loneliness, like mine and sadness. For a moment I wondered if he had suffered like I had.

"You saw them too huh?" he asked.

I remained silent. He was talking about Jak and Ashelin. I realized at that moment I was not the only one who had lost a loved one. He loved Ashelin, like I did Jak, and for him, knowing that his love wasn't enough for her hurt. I understood that. He might understand me too.

Finally, I nodded. I heard him sigh. I could feel his gaze on me, seeping inside my skin. He was trying to read me. Maybe to see if I did love Jak.

I saw you by the gates. I was standing a few feet from Sig and Ashelin, but in the shadows so . . . they didn't see me. They're in the palace right now. All of them. They're celebrating. Your father wanted to know where you were so I came looking for you." He paused.

"You know, I thought she would tell me. What she did? But she didn't. She just walked past me, as if I were nothing. As if she couldn't see me. Like I was invisible or something. It stung you know. I thought she would tell me but . . . I guess I was wrong. Maybe she was just another mistake. I was wrong about her. She's just like another one of those . . ." He didn't finish his sentence but I had a pretty good idea what he was talking about.

So he had suffered too huh? He was like me. He was a man whose heart was filled with a whirlwind of mixed-up emotions, he had clouds of painful memories he wished to forget. Like me he had a broken past.

All this time I thought he was just another tough looking guy. I knew him as the Underworld's commander. I knew him as a man who had no emotions at all, willing to sacrifice the lives of others for his own gain. But . . . he was like me. Broken . . . Forgotten . . .

So I told him my story. The story that I've been hiding from everyone. I hid them because I knew they wouldn't understand. But here he was, different from all of them. Sure, I didn't know him quite well but I recognized the pain in his eyes. It was the same pain I was going through. The same _unbearable_ pain.

I started form the very beginning.

End

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Dark-Wolf91: I know it's a short chapter but remember guys this is just the prologue. There's more to come! 


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